Grinners for today

Jay Leno:

"Well, the terror level on John Kerry's face has now been raised to orange."

"First, he gets the botox. Now, he's got the rich tan. I think Kerry's
confused. The Miss America pageant was last week."

"Debate experts say President Bush could win if he doesn't get off-message.
And then they say Kerry could win if he gets a message."

"Kerry's people are having problems preparing him for the debate. You know, they keep trying to tell him, he doesn't talk like the regular 'Average Joe.' And Kerry said, 'Au contraire.'"